This whole love thing is complicated, is it not? Love jokes poke fun at our insecurities as well as our triumphs in love and relationships. You might be looking for jokes to write inside a card for your partner or just looking for ways to lighten the tension and bring things back down to Earth. Whatever your situation may be, any excuse is a good excuse for a well-intentioned joke.
We have found the funniest love jokes with plenty of charm for your to share with loved ones about all things love. These clever jokes mine the depths of our humanity and the emotion that we most often struggle with, love. If you need a laugh or, more importantly, your significant other could use one, you’ve come to the right place because we have over 100 love jokes to share with you so that you can pass them along and spread laughter along with your admiration. Check them out!
Love Jokes That Will Make You Feel a Certain Way
- Why should you never break up with a goalie? Because he is a keeper.
- How do you get a farm girl to like you? A tractor.
- What happened when the two vampires went on a blind date? It was love at first bite.
- What did one boat say to the other? Are you up for a little row-mance?
- My new boyfriend works at the zoo. I think he’s a keeper.
Love Jokes: Marriage Edition
- What’s the difference between love and marriage? Love is blind. Marriage is an eye-opener.
- What did the cannibal’s wife do when her husband came home an hour late for dinner? She gave him the cold shoulder.
- Why does a man twist his wedding ring on his finger? He’s trying to figure out the combination.
- Marriage is like going to a restaurant. You order what you want, then when you see what the other person ordered, you wish you had gotten that.
- A retired husband is often a wife’s full-time job.
More Love Jokes About Marriage
- Why did the king of hearts marry the Queen of hearts? They were perfectly suited for each other.
- A young boy asks his father, “Daddy, how much does it cost to get married?” And the father replies, “I don’t know, son, I’m still paying for it.”
- Why did the bee get married? Because he found his honey.
- Marriage is like a bar of soap. It smells delicious until you take a bite out of it!
- What do you call two spiders that just got married? Newly-webs.
Valentine’s Day Love Jokes
- What did one light bulb say to the other on Valentine’s Day? I love you a whole watt.
- What did the chef give to his wife on Valentine’s Day? A hug and a quiche.
- Do skunks celebrate Valentine’s Day? Why, yes! They’re very scent-imental.
- What do you call two birds in love? Tweethearts.
- What did one watermelon say to the other on Valentine’s Day? You’re one in a melon.
Knock Knock Love Jokes
- Knock! Knock! / Who’s there? / Olive. / Olive, who? / Olive you, and I don’t care who else knows it!
- Knock! Knock! / Who’s there? / Owl. / Owl, who? / Owl always love you.
- Knock! Knock! / Who’s there? / Iguana. / Iguana, who? / Iguana love you forever and always!
- Knock! Knock! / Who’s there? / Juno. / Juno, who? / Juno that you’re the love of my life?
- Knock! Knock! / Who’s there? / Honeydew. / Honeydew, who? / Honeydew you know how much I love you?
More Knock Knock Love Jokes
- Knock! Knock! / Who’s there? / Ben. / Ben, who? / Ben thinking about you all day.
- Knock! Knock! / Who’s there? / Halibut. / Halibut, who? / Halibut a kiss for me?
- Knock! Knock! / Who’s there? / Eyesore. / Eyesore, who? / Eyesore do love you a lot.
- Knock! Knock! / Who’s there? / Leena. / Leena, who? / Leena little closer so I can kiss you!
- Knock! Knock! / Who’s there? / Harry. / Harry, who? / Harry up and kiss me!
Love Jokes About Exes
- My ex got into a bad accident recently. I told the doctors the wrong blood type. Now he will really know what rejection feels like.
- My ex-wife still misses me. But her aim is steadily improving.
- All I’m saying is that I’ve never seen Satan and my ex in the same room together.
- Relationships are a lot like algebra. Have you ever looked at your X and wondered Y?
- Love’s a lot like a bullet, in that, the exit usually causes the most damage.
Young Love Jokes
- Let’s commit the perfect crime together. I’ll steal your heart and you can steal mine.
- I’m learning about important dates in history. Wanna go on one?
- Two antennas met on a roof, fell in love, and got married. The ceremony wasn’t much, but the reception was great.
- My partner and I met by accident. It all started when he backed his car into mine.
- When you are in love, it is the most glorious two and a half days of your life.
Love Jokes About Romance
- Why do painters always fall for their models? Because they love them with all of their art.
- I know this is going to sound cheesy, but I think you’re the gratest.
- Are you a banana? Because I find you a peeling.
- What did the hopeless romantic baker say to his dough? I knead you!
- What did the keyboard say to the computer? You are just my type!
More Love Jokes About Romance
- Are you a mermaid? Because you’re cute as shell!
- I think you might be suffering from a lack of vitamin me.
- What did one volcano say to the other volcano? I lava you.
- Did you hear about the love affair between sugar and cream? It was the icing on the cake.
- Do you like Star Wars? Because Yoda only one for me!
Dark Love Jokes
- My girlfriend left me because she couldn’t handle my OCD. I told her to close the door five times on her way out.
- My girlfriend told me she was leaving me because I keep pretending to be a Transformer. I said, “No, wait! I can change!”
- My girlfriend says, “You act like a detective too much. I want to split up.” I said, “Good idea. We can cover more ground that way.”
- What do you say to your single friends on Valentine’s Day? Happy Independence Day!
- What did one pig say to the other? Don’t go bacon my heart
Heartbreak Love Jokes
- My girlfriend broke up with me at our favorite date spot. I was so shocked and heartbroken I got up and immediately stormed out the door. And that’s how I fell off the Ferris wheel.
- Why were the star-crossed melons heartbroken? Because they cantaloupe.
- I’m absolutely heartbroken. My Girlfriend has broken up with me over my chronic gambling addiction. I’m desperate to win her back.
- My girlfriend broke up with me after we did a marathon. I’m pretty heartbroken, but we had a good run.
- I caught my son Googling really sketchy adult sites, and I was completely heartbroken. We are strictly a Bing family.
Monster Love Jokes
- What happened when two vampires went on their first date? It was love at first bite!
- I just saw two zombies on a date. And they say romance is dead.
- What does a ghost call his true love? His ghoul-friend.
- Ey girl, are you a monster? Cause you are FrankenFINE.
- Son: “Dad! Dad! There is a monster under my bed!” / Dad: “Enjoy it while you can son when you get married the monster sleeps in your bed”
Occupational Love Jokes
- Why did the baseball player have trouble dating? He always had a hard time getting to first base.
- Why should you never date a tennis player? Because love means nothing to them.
- What did the astronaut’s girlfriend say to him when he proposed in outer space? I can’t breathe!
- Just went on a date with a welder. Wow! The sparks were flying!
- What happens when you fall in love with a chef? You get buttered up.
Animal Love Jokes
- What do you call two ants sharing a slice of pizza in Italy? Romance.
- Why did the lion break up with his girlfriend? Because she was a cheetah.
- What did the girl cat say to the boy cat on Valentine’s Day? You’re purr-fect for me.
- Did you hear about the porcupine who was near-sighted? Poor guy fell in love with a pincushion.
- What sound do porcupines make when they kiss? “Ouch!”
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Bleak Love Jokes
- Never laugh at your S.O.’s choices. You are one.
- Let’s emotionally damage each other and call it love.
- Love is like farting. If you have to force it, it’s going to end in a mess.
- Love is telling someone to “go to Hell” but hoping they get there safely.
- My friends laughed at me when I said I had a hot date and said that she was imaginary. The joke’s on them, though. They’re imaginary, too.
Offbeat Love Jokes
- I told my boyfriend to text me when he got home. He must be homeless.
- I like Jesus. But, he loves me, so it’s kind of awkward.
- My girlfriend and I often laugh about how competitive we are. But, I laugh more.
- If I ever have a heart transplant, I’d want my ex’s. It’s never been used.
- Women fake orgasms. Men fake whole relationships.
Corny Love Jokes
- Are you French? Because Eiffel for you.
- My boyfriend and I met on the internet. My mother asked him what line he used on me and my boyfriend replied, “I just used the modem.”
- Are you a cat? Because I’m feline a connection between us.
- How did the telephone propose to his girlfriend? He gave her a ring.
- What do I have in common with Internet Explorer? I always want to crash at your place.
More Corny Love Jokes
- If love is blind, why is lingerie so popular?
- Is your name Dunkin? Because I Donut want to spend another day without you.
- Even if there wasn’t gravity on earth, I’d still fall for you.
- A couple are on a date at a fancy restaurant. The woman tells the man to say something to her that will get her heart racing. He replies, “I forgot my wallet.”
- Is your name WiFi? Because I’m really feeling a strong connection.
Love Jokes About Dating
- Due to the current economic situation in the world, I’ve started a dating site for chickens. It’s not my full-time job, I’m just doing it… to make hens meet.
- I really have no idea what carbon dating is. But, I’ll try anything at this point.
- I just joined a dating group for arsonists. Got a match straight away.
- I made a dating app for marionettes, and it failed. Everyone wanted No Strings Attached.
- Help! I am a man and my parents don’t approve of me dating another man. They say I need to divorce the one I am married to first.
Love Jokes About Weddings
- Did you hear about the two spiders who just got engaged? I hear they met on the web.
- Two cannonballs got married this morning. I hear they’re already expecting BBs.
- Did you hear about the bald man who married his comb? He promised, “I’ll never part with it!”
- Grooms, once you’re married, remember that when you have a discussion with your wife, always remember to get the last two words in: “Yes, dear.”
- It doesn’t matter how often a married man changes his job. He still ends up with the same boss.
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Our Favorite Love Jokes
- Why are husbands like lawn mowers? They are hard to get started, give off foul odors, and do not work half the time.
- Sadly, hydrogen and helium broke things off. But they still think of each other periodically.
- Love is one long sweet dream. And, marriage is the alarm clock.
- After a quarrel, a wife said to her husband, “You know, I was a fool when I married you.”
And the husband replied, “Yes, dear, but I was in love and didn’t notice it.”
- Did you hear about the notebook that married a pencil? It finally found Mr. Write.
There you go! What did you think of these silly love jokes? There’s a lot to laugh about when it comes to love, right!? Use these love jokes for a card for your S.O. or simply shoot them a joke via text to cheer them up. Who could be made at a great joke in the inbox? Spread the love with these funny jokes and expect to get it returned!
Andrew is a Chicago-based writer who enjoys finding the best of the internet, obsessively making lists, and cooking for friends. After studying Film and Art History, he developed a deep love for both topics. Celebrity news, pop culture, and stories that bring people together are his passions.
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