One user is asking Reddit if they are in the wrong for confronting their neighbor who insisted they stop talking in their own garden.
“Was having a chat with my sisters in the garden over lunch. Normal volume, not talking about anything particularly salacious, when the neighbor called over the fence and said ‘Excuse me, can you stop talking? We’re trying to have a nice family meal,’” the OP (Original Poster) began.
“Me and sisters were shocked. Apologized as sort of a knee-jerk, but a few minutes later I went around into their gated community and politely told her how inappropriate her request was. We have as much right to enjoy time outside as she does.”
“She wailed that she could hear everything we were saying and knew all about us, and got cross when I politely pointed out that the same was true of her and her conversations. We regularly hear her arguing with her husband and shouting at her grandkids, as well as just her normal conversations out in the garden.”
“I thought she needed to know that since we were not being excessively noisy, and since it was mid-afternoon and not 1 A.M. or anything, her complaint was not very appropriate. But [my] sisters think I should have let it go.”
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One user commented:
“The neighbor thought she could demand something unreasonable from you. You politely responded by saying that’s unacceptable. If [the neighbor] is sane, she learned her demand wasn’t successful and won’t try it again. If she isn’t sane then you can ignore or reiterate. Or you could escalate and tell her that she’s being a nuisance when she yells at you over the fence.”
While another commented: “I would just start talking loudly about how you hear the neighbor and her husband fighting outside all the time. She is really upset that he won’t get treatment for his erectile condition. That explains why she is so strung up all the time. But then, I don’t care about the moral high ground.”
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“NTA. If it’s a person passing by being a dork, ignore it. But if it’s a person who is there to stay, you need to set and defend healthy boundaries. You were not inappropriate in any way and spoke your truth. Nothing will ever change if dumb behavior is not met with healthy and respectful pushback. Just make sure not to stoop to their level. Power to you and enjoy your fresh air.”
What do YOU think?
With a background in the creative and educational fields, Amelia Finefrock is freelance writer, singer-songwriter and nanny based in Chicago.
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